Singh joke

One Singh was enjoying the sun at the beach in America.
A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing?" Singh answered, "No, I am Banta Singh." Another guy came and asked the him the same question.
Singh answered, "No No Me Banta Singh!"
Third one came and asked him the same question again.
Singh was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place.
While walking he saw another Singh soaking in the sun.
He went up to him and asked, "Are you Relaxing?"
The other Singh was a lot more educated and answered, "Yes, I am
relaxing."

The Sing slapped him on his face and said, "Stupid, idiot.
Everyone is looking for you and your are sitting over here!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Singh died and went to heaven. When he got to the pearly gate
Saint Peter told him that new rules were in effect due to the advances in education on earth. In order to gain admittance a prospective heavenly soul, he must answer two questions:

1. Name two days of the week that begin with "T".
2. How many seconds are in a year?
The Singh thought for a few minutes and answered...
1. The two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today and Tomorrow.
2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
Saint Peter said, "OK, I'll buy the Today and Tomorrow answer, even though it's not the answer I expected.
But how did you get 12 seconds in a year?"
The Singh replied, "Well, January 2nd, February 2nd,March 2nd, etc..."
Saint Peter lets him in without another word.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jasmeet Kaur caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room.
Jasmeet: "What are you searching for?"
Santa: "Hidden cameras!"
Jasmeet: "And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?"
Santa: "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why every
minutes he keeps saying 'You are watching the Star World Channel'. How does he know that?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three men were stranded on an uninhabited island. One was Hindu, one a Muslim, and the other a Singh.
The only way back home was to swim 100 miles to the next island, which was inhabited.
The Muslim was so determined to get home that he tried to swim. He made it 50 miles, got tired, and drowned.
Then the Hindu tried. He made it 75 miles, but got tired and drowned, too.

The Singh thought he could make it all the way, so he started swimming. He swam 50 miles, but started getting tired, so he swam all the way back to the island.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Having lost his donkey a Singh, got down to his knees and started
thanking God.
A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you
thanking God for ?"
The Singh replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding
the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination.
He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window.
He then removes his turban and throws it away as well.
His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit. The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.

"Oye, I am only following the instructions yaar,"
he says, " it says here, 'Answer the following questions in brief'.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Singhs were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like hell.

So the other asked, "Why are you crying?"
The first one said, "I came here for blood test" Second one asked, "So? Are you afraid ? " First one replied, " No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger"

Hearing this the second one started crying. The first one was astonished
and asked other, "Why are you crying?" The other replied, "I have come for my urine test."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Singh goes to a hotel and eats heartily.
After eating he goes to wash hands but starts washing the basin instead.
The manager comes running and asks him, Mr. Singh, what are you doing?"
To this the man replies," Oye, see the board here, "Wash Basin".

Read more...

Office comic

  A husband and wife go visit a marriage counselor in Bombay.

  First, the wife speaks to the counselor alone. The counselor asks, "You say you've been married 20 years, so what seems to be the problem?"

  The wife replies, "It's my husband - he's driving me crazy! I'm going to leave him if he continues!"

  "How does he drive you crazy?"

  "For 20 years," she says, "he's been doing these stupid things. First,  whenever we go out, he's always looking at the floor and refuses to go near anyone. It's very embarrassing."

  The marriage counselor is amused, "Anything else?"

  "He keeps picking his nose all the time! Even in public!"

  "Hmm, anything else?"

  The wife hesitates, "whenever we're making love, he NEVER lets me be on top!

  Once in a while, I'd like to be in control!"

  "Ah," says the counselor, "I think I'll talk to your husband now."

  So the wife goes out of the room and the husband enters. The counselor tells him, "Your wife says that you've been driving her crazy. She might even leave you."

  The husband looks shocked, "WHAT? For 20 years I've been loving and considerate and I've always given her what she wants! What could be the problem?"

  The counselor explains, "She says that you've got these habits that are driving her crazy. First, you're always acting strange in public-looking at the floor and never going near anyone else."

  The husband looks concerned, "Oh, you don't understand! It's one of the few things my father told me to do on his death bed and I swore I'd obey everything he said."

  "What did he say?"

  "He said that I should never step on anyone's toes!"

  The counselor looks amused, "Actually, that means that you should not do anything that would cause anyone else to get angry." The husband looks sheepish, "Oh. Okay."

  The counselor continues, "And you keep picking your nose in public."

  "Well, its another thing my father specifically commanded me to do! He told me to always keep my nose clean." The counselor looks faint, "That means that you should not indulge in any criminal activity." "Oh," says the husband looking very stupid.

  "And finally, she says that you never allow her to be on top during your love making."

  "This," says the husband seriously, "is the last thing my father commanded me to do on his deathbed and it's the most important thing."

  "What did he say?"

  The husband replies, "In his dying breath, he said, "Don't screw up."

Read more...

The Wooden Bowl

I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now,
a year from now.
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson.
The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.
The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and
failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor.
When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
'We must do something about father,' said the son.
'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner.
There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.
Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.
Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.
The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor.
He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded,
'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up. '

The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.
That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason,
neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens, how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
a rainy day,the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life.'
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.You need to be able to throw something back sometimes.
I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you.
But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.
I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.
People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.
I've learned that you should pass this on to everyone you care about. I just did!

FRIENDSHIP CANDLE


NOTICE AT THE END,
THE DATE THE CANDLE WAS STARTED.

GONNA GIVE YOU GOOSE BUMPS.


I am not going to be the one who lets it die. I found it believable --

angels have walked beside me all my life--and they still do.

*********************


This is to all of you who
mean something to me,

I pray for your happiness.

The Candle Of Love, Hope & Friendship

This candle was lit on the
15th of September, 1998

Someone who loves you has helped
keep it alive by sending it to you.


Don't let The Candle of Love, Hope and Friendship die.


Share It On To All Of Your Friends
and Everyone You Love!

May God richly bless you!

Read more...

A Wild Night At My House

A Wild Night At My House

HOW TRUE IT IS

Another year has passed
And we're all a little older.

Last summer felt hotter
And winter seems much colder.

I rack my brain for happy thoughts,
To put down on my pad,

But lots of things, That come to mind
Just make me kind of sad.

There was a time not long ago
When life was quite a blast.

Now I fully understand
About 'Living in the Past'.

We used to go to friends' homes,
Baseball games and lunches.

Now we go to therapy, to hospitals,
And after-funeral brunches.

We used to have hangovers,
From parties that were gay.

Now we suffer body aches
And sleep the night away.

We used to go out dining,
And couldn't get our fill.

Now we ask for doggie bags,
Come home and take a pill.

We used to travel often
To places near and far.

Now we get backaches
From riding in the car.

We used to go out shopping
For new clothing at the Mall

But, now we never bother...
All the sizes are too small.

That, my friend is how life is,
And now my tale is told.

So, enjoy each day and live it up...
Before you're too damn old!!

You pass this way only once so enjoy it while you can; Live A Lot, Laugh A Lot and Love A Lot!

There is very little difference in people but that

little difference makes a big difference.

This difference is attitude.

The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.

- W. Clemet Stone

Read more...

Dedicated To All those Born in 1940's, 50's , 60's

First, we survived with mothers who had no maids. They cooked /cleaned while taking care of us at the same time.
They took aspirin, candy floss, fizzy drinks, shaved ice with syrups and diabetes were rare. Salt added to Pepsi or Coke was remedy for fever.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
As children, we would ride with our parents on bicycles/ motorcycles for 2 or 3. Richer ones in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a private taxi was a special treat.
We drank water from the tap and NOT from a bottle.
We would spend hours on the fields under bright sunlight flying our kites, without worrying about the UV ray which never seem to affect us.
We went to the jungle to catch spiders without worries of Aedes mosquitoes.
With mere 5 pebbles (stones) would be a endless game. With a ball (tennis ball best) we boys would run like crazy for hours.
We caught guppies in drains / canals and when it rained, we swam there.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually worried about being unhygienic.
We ate salty, very sweet & oily food, candies, bread and real butter and drank very sweet soft sweet coffee/ tea, ice kacang, but we weren't overweight because.......
WE WERE OFTEN OUT PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, till street lights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day.WE DID NOT HAVE HANDPHONE TO BUG US. And we were O.K. AND WE WERE SAFE.
We would spend hours repairing our old bicycles and wooden scooters out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem .
We did not have Playstations, X-boxes, Nintendo's, multiple channels on cable TV, DVD movies, no surround sound, no phones, no personal computers, no Internet. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and we still continued the stunts.
We never had birthdays parties till we were 21
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and just yelled for them!
We don't know what is "Bumiputra"......
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law ! Nobody knew about child psychology !
Yet this generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 40 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned ......!!
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!
And YOU are one of them!
CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the government 'regulated' our lives for good !!
And while you are at it, share it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
P/S: -The big font used is because of Long-sightedness or hyperopia at our age.

Read more...

A HEALING FOR BURNS

BURNS

A young man sprinkling his lawn and bushes with pesticides wanted to check the contents of the barrel to see how much pesticide remained in it.

He raised the cover and lit his lighter; the vapors ignited and engulfed him. He jumped from his truck, screaming.

His neighbour came out of her house with a dozen eggs and a bowl yelling: "bring me some more eggs!"

She broke them, separating the whites from the yolks.

The neighbor woman helped her to apply the whites onto the young man's face.

When the ambulance arrived and the EMTs saw the young man, they asked who had done this.

Everyone pointed to the lady in charge.

They congratulated her and said: "You have saved his face."

By the end of the summer, the young man brought the lady a bouquet of roses to thank her.

His face was like a baby's skin.

A Healing Miracle for Burns:

Keep in mind this treatment of burns is being included in teaching beginner fireman. First Aid consists of first spraying cold water on the affected area until the heat is reduced which stops the continued burning of all layers of the skin. Then, spread the egg whites onto the affected area.

One woman burned a large part of her hand with boiling water. In spite of the pain, she ran cold faucet water on her hand, separated 2 egg whites from the yolks, beat them slightly and dipped her hand in the solution. The whites then dried and formed a protective layer.

She later learned that the egg white is a natural collagen and continued during at least one hour to apply layer upon layer of beaten egg white. By afternoon she no longer felt any pain and the next day there was hardly a trace of the burn. 10 days later, no trace was left at all and her skin had regained its normal color. The burned area was totally regenerated thanks to the collagen in the egg whites, a placenta full of vitamins.

Since this information could be helpful to everyone: Won't you please SHARE it on?

Read more...

中年四字訣

中年四字訣

淡。

包括吃得清淡，放棄濃味，是對身體有益。也包括「君子之交淡如水」，就是跟人的關係不要太親密緊黏，既保護自己免受心靈重創，也是維持健康關係的最好距離。

專。

做事情，要專於自己最擅長的，便會做得最好，其他無關痛癢的就交給別人吧！

交友也是，跟臭味相投的交往已不夠時間，別花心思在「志不同道不合」的人身上。

慢。

終於明白，人生許多事情是迫不來的，要等，要燉，要放慢腳步。太急的話，會亂了陣腳，反而誤了大事。

放。

那是最難的。放手，撇下，人生的行李會更輕，旅程也會更輕鬆啊！

老人七悟

一、活著：

日出東海落西山，活一天，少一天。過一天，樂一天。樂一天，賺一天。

二、高興：

高官不如高薪，高薪不如高壽，高壽不如高興。高興了就好，只有高興是現款，其他至多不過是支票而已。

三、自己的：

地位是暫時的，榮譽是過去的，健康是自己的。

四、不一樣：

父母對子女的愛是無限的，子女對父母的愛是有限的；子女有病，父母揪心，父母有病，子女對父母問問、看看就知足；子女花父母的錢，理直氣壯，父母花子女的錢，就不那麼順暢；父母家也就是子女的家，子女家可不是父母家，不一樣就是不一樣。明白人把對子女的付出視為義務和樂趣，不圖回報，一心想回報，就是自尋煩惱。

五、指望誰：

養病指望誰？指望子女，久病床前無孝子；指望老伴，自顧不暇，無能為力；只能指望錢，用錢養病。

六、懷舊：

常想一二忘九八，健康長壽樣樣有；老當益壯天地寬，滿目青山松和柳。

七、直接面對死亡：

生老病死，自然規律，人人平等，要有思想準備，一旦閻王策小鬼來叫，無牽無掛無語，跟上走就是了。

『一帆風順的時候不要得意忘形，一波三折的時候也不必灰心喪志。

情況好的時候，不能沒有警覺心；壞的時候也不要喪失信心；可能條件一改變，情況就會轉變。』

『我們不一定會因為賺很多的錢而富有，但我們可以因付出的善念而使心中富有。』

Read more...

如果這張圖震動 表示眼睛該休息囉

如果這張圖震動 表示眼睛該休息囉

Read more...

Effective ways to lower your cholestrol

The lifestyle of today is such that people always have too many balls in the air and are competing with time. However, that is no excuse to eat junk food on the go all the time. It leads to obesity and high cholesterol levels which are harmful for health. Even though awareness regarding this has been generated, the number of people suffering from high cholesterol has continues to increase steadily over the years. High cholesterol can easily be managed by following a few basic rules. Read on, before it’s too late.

1) Diet: The types of food you eat and they way they’re prepared can have an immense effect on the cholesterol levels in your body. Certain food themselves contain cholesterol which are known as dietary cholesterol. Some examples of such foods are kidneys, eggs and prawns. However, the as compared to saturated fats, cholesterol found in such food has much less effect on the level of cholesterol in your blood. It is essential to cut down on saturated fats in order to reduce your cholesterol levels.

i. Fats and Cholesterol : Saturated and unsaturated are the two main types of fat. Consuming foods that are high in saturated fat can raise cholesterol levels in the blood. Foods high in saturated fat include ghee, cheese, cream, cakes, biscuits, fatty cuts of meat and foods containing coconut or palm oil. Unsaturated fat can actually help in reducing cholesterol levels. Foods high in unsaturated fats include oily fish, nuts, seeds and vegetable oils and spreads. As nuts are high in calories, only a handful is enough per serving. Include nuts such as almonds, hazelnuts, walnuts etcetera. Fish contains omega-3 fatty acids which are very good for the heart. Finally, reduce the total amount of fat in your diet by avoiding fried and roasted foods. Steam, boil or grill your food. If you must use oil, use olive oil.

ii. Fiber and cholesterol: The two different types of fiber are soluble fiber and insoluble fiber. Soluble fiber can be digested by your body whereas insoluble fiber cannot. Foods containing soluble fiber include oats, beans, peas, lentils, chickpeas and of course, fruits and vegetables. Bananas are an excellent source of fiber. Soluble fiber can reduce the absorption of cholesterol into your bloodstream.

iii. Another important point to be considered is the size of the portion being consumed. Try to eat 5 balanced meals, containing small portions, a day. Reducing your intake of caffeine can also help in lowering your cholesterol levels.

2) Exercise: Studies have shown that exercising even 3 times a week can reduce your cholesterol levels. The best form of exercise is to go for long walks. It doesn’t require anything and can be done anytime, even in between your work. If you are looking more vigorous activities then you can try cycling, running, dancing and go to the gym. The most important thing is to enjoy what you do.

3) Drink Water: Try to drink at least 8 glasses of water per day as drinking more water keeps the body fitter as it reduces fats. Our kidneys also do not function properly if adequate amount of water is not supplied. Moreover, it also eliminates water retention properly. It makes the endocrine gland function properly which helps in balancing our body’s electrolytes, minerals such as sodium, chloride and potassium, which regulate body temperature and control blood pressure. Finally, it helps in the transportation of water-soluble vitamins and nutrients such as protein, minerals and vitamins across the body.

4) Quit Smoking: Smoking not only increases the LDL (low density lipoproteins, the bad cholesterol, while decreasing HDL (high density lipoproteins), the good cholesterol levels. This damages the arteries. The nicotine in cigarettes can also lead to heart palpitations. Smoking also makes the blood stickier by raising fibrinogen levels and platelet counts. Carbon monoxide from cigarette smoke also raises blood cholesterol levels. Research has found that giving up smoking leads to the rising of the HDL levels and depleting of the LDL levels. Within 24 hours of quitting, risk of a heart attack subsides. Due to all the above, it is proven that it makes sense to quit smoking.

Read more...

Try it out..

MAGIC #1

An Indian found that nobody can create a FOLDER anywhere on
the Computer which can be named as "CON". This is
something funny and inexplicable? At Microsoft the whole
Team, couldn't answer why this happened!
TRY IT NOW, IT WILL NOT CREATE A "CON" FOLDER

MAGIC #2

For those of you using Windows, do the following:

1.) Open an empty notepad file
2.) Type "Bush hid the facts" (without the
quotes)
3.) Save it as whatever you want.
4.) Close it, and re-open it.

Noticed the weird bug?
No one can explain!

MAGIC #3

Again this is something funny and can't be explained?
At Microsoft the whole Team, including Bill Gates,
couldn't answer why this happened!

It was discovered by a Brazilian. Try it out
yourself?

Open Microsoft Word and type

=rand (200, 99)

And then press ENTER
And see the
magic?..!

Magic #4

Did you know that a flight number from one of the planes that hit one of the two WTC towers on 9/11 was Q33N. In Notepad / WordPad or MS Word, type that flight number i.e. Q33N. Increase the font size to 72. Change the font to Wingdings. ….. u will be amazed by the findings!!!…………………..

Read more...

肢體語言

手臂交叉

不知道你有沒有注意過小孩子的肢體語言？像兩、三歲的小孩因為會講的話不多，所以他們會大量運用身體語言再搭配簡短的一、兩個字，傳達出他們的情緒，像他們生氣時，經常會看到他們把雙手擺到胸前交叉，然後說：「不要」。在身體語言的領域裡，手臂格外有趣，因為光是採取交叉的姿勢，它們便足以在人與人間構築一道防衛的『屏障』。」 

人的手臂可以在我們不自在的時候交叉，像一聽到我們不敢苟同的事情、處於緊張狀態，或是負面思想通過我們的心，我們就會採取防衛姿態。這個姿勢經常會在捷運站、火車站、電梯排隊……任何會讓人感到不自在或不安全的地點看見。另外還有一種變形的兩臂交叉法，像J.K.羅琳走上紅地毯時，一隻手會伸向另一側的耳朵做調整耳環的動作，這也是就近以手臂形成的防衛機制。 

所以在工作上，在和同事、客戶或上司開會或討論期間，如果他們忽然出現兩臂交叉的姿勢，那你可能提出了什麼他們不認同的事。他們或許嘴巴上會說一切沒問題（但態度猶豫、聲音較小），但這種姿勢，或許再加上表情的轉變（較「不開放」），就足以敲響警鐘了。 

當遇到對方雙交叉的情況時，拿個東西或找事給對方做，這樣都能讓他們打開雙臂的「死鎖」。有一次他和一位女同事去做了一個簡報，女同事感覺客戶突然出現「不太有興趣」的手臂交叉狀態了，當時他們手邊也沒有合適或相關的文件可以給對方，於是她就拿起一罐新的咖啡，假裝緊得沒辦法開，然後問客戶願不願意幫忙。客戶眉開眼笑的幫她，此時他的雙臂打開了，他們也提早進行中場休息，趁著喝咖啡時他們就順便問客戶是不是有需要解釋的地方。不過在與人互動時，解除防衛狀態，採取「開放」的姿態，才有助於雙方的談話有結果。

壓力下，手最常見的動作 

研究調查顯示，在處於壓力的情況下最常見的手接觸頭或臉的動作依序是：

1. 托著下顎。

2. 托著下巴。

3. 摸頭髮。

4. 托腮。

5. 碰嘴巴。

6. 支於鬢角處。

人在感到不自在時所做的撫摸、擁抱和觸摸等自我安慰的姿勢，據說都與孩童時期有關。頭部動作是個有趣的範疇，它能鼓勵人們說話並營造親密和諧。

有5種用點頭表示「贊同」的模式：

•鼓勵的點頭──對，好極了。

•承認的點頭──對，我還在聽。

•理解的點頭──對，我了解你的意思。

•事實的點頭──對，事實就是這樣。

•認同的點頭──對，我會這麼做。 

研究顯示，常常點頭示意的人引誘說話者透露的資訊，是不點頭者的 4 倍之多。

求歡式說服術》提出誘因 

有3個重要的問題，可以協助你以一種系統化的方式找出說服對象的利益何在：

 1. 為什麼對方支持我的想法，就會他有利？

2. 什麼是對方想要，我又給得出的東西，能夠換取支持？

3. 什麼可能是對方會拒絕的原因？ 

在這個世上，能夠影響別人的唯一方法，就是提一提他們想要什麼，並讓他們看到怎樣才能獲得那樣東西。

傾聽對方說什麼 

自覺是內心的一具溫度計，告訴我們當下的心情是快樂、悲傷、不安，還是充滿信心。在說服別人時，如果你能夠展現更多的自覺，不但會更清楚自己的感受，也可以得知對方的反應.

缺乏信心或害怕失敗的說服者，往往會過分在意自己提出的訊息，耳中只聽見自己講的話，腦中也只想著下一句該說什麼。認真觀察對方的反應，適時調整自己的說話內容，才可以繼續留在賽局中。世界的步調快速、人的時間有限，「第一印象」成了我們不斷被人評判的標準：要不要相信我們、要不要喜歡我們、要不要與我們合作、要不要跟我們談戀愛……大家全憑直覺下定論，「說話」扮演傳遞資訊的角色，身體則負責傳達感覺。

人的一舉一動會大聲喊出你或許不想透露的心情和感覺。今天就算我們不是在講假話，可是說出來的話搭配了會讓人懷疑實情的身體語言，言語和身體語言就無法達成「一致」。傳達錯誤印象或許只是個尚未改正的壞習慣。噘嘴、雙手托腮、說話時以手指掩嘴、在不恰當的時刻嘆氣、一邊說話一邊不斷調整坐姿……這些或許都只是不當的習慣，而不是代表特定感覺的姿勢。但重點在於：它們可能會被誤解。身體語言走漏了你不想透露的風聲，已經夠不好了；如果你只是惱人的習慣或舉止扭曲了你的訊息，讓你很「無辜」，那就更不妙了。

說謊和欺騙的範疇令許多人著迷，也是諸多科學研究的主題；心理學家及其他研究人員一直在探索這個領域。一如解讀身體語言行為的其他層面，沒有單一姿勢可以證明你的觀點無誤。而讓情況更加不利的是，它是一個我們從童年就不斷演練的行為。即便到青少年階段，乃至步入成年之初，我們仍會對我們煩惱多多的父母「選擇性」的吐實。所以……，熟能生巧。
如果和你打交道的是你本來就認識的人，事情就簡單一些。你可以比較那個人的行為與呈現的任何偏差。如果對方是你不熟或第一次見面的人，那就要觀察他們在凡事放鬆且從容時，也就是他們完全不會不自在時的言行舉止。當你開始熟悉一個人的習性之後，察看是否有「行為變異」的指標。你必須看他們的表情、眼部活動和目光、手部動作、自我安慰的姿勢、手臂的動作、腳與腿的活動，以及副語言。

說謊的人笑得比較少 

一般認為，你可以分辨某人是不是在說謊，是因為他通常會綻放一抹微笑來掩蓋事實。當然，這是因為如果對方不老實，你會預期在他臉上看到與事實截然相反的表情。微笑看來較不可疑，還有附加利益：我們知道，微笑通常能增進對方的好感。老是以貌取人，人類不都這樣嗎？大致來說，事實未必如此。所有研究顯示，說謊的人反而笑得「比較少」。這不是說騙子不會笑，他們只是笑得比較少。騙子會認為，人家看他們在笑會起疑，所以刻意抑制自己笑出來。 

人們撒謊時的笑都是「假」笑。要尋找不真誠笑容的典型徵兆，請記得，假笑通常出現得急，維持得比真笑來得久，然後驟然而逝。「有感而發」或真實的笑，通常出現得緩，也消失得慢。當你對某人說謊時，要製造真誠的笑很難。別忘了，假笑的臉是不對稱的，而且嘴角不會上揚，反而會下垂。就多數人而論，歪向一邊的笑顯然不是發自喜悅的真笑。但我們在一般「禮貌性」的互動通常不會介意這麼多，因為笑就是笑，我們能自我調適到心領神會就好。但如果我們要尋找支持其他身體信號的線索，這種笑就能協助我們判斷。

眼神瞟左可能正在編謊 

 神經科學家一致認為大腦的左右兩邊各司其職。左腦是邏輯的腦，處理理性、分析和語言活動；右腦是較有想像力及創造力，也較憑「直覺」的一半。左右兩腦的功能有以下明顯的區隔： 當你要取用「貯存」於大腦的資訊（也就是回想）來搜尋某個問題的答案，你的左腦會比較活躍。如果你在說謊，大腦就不會回想，但它必須運用想像力來創造虛構的答案，所以這是右腦的活動。

已經有研究發現，因為我們在和另一人說話時都會自然中斷眼神接觸，視線的方向可以透露一個人有沒有在講真心話。為什麼？大腦的兩邊各自掌控身體相反邊的活動（這點你或許已經知道），說得更明白點，左腦掌管右側，右腦掌管左側。 所以，如果對方在回答你的問題的時候望向右方，他可能是在說實話（左腦職掌回想）。 若對方的眼神瞟向左方，他們或許正編織謊言，因為它是來自大腦負責想像的右半部。只要暗中確立視線接觸的模式，這會是個相當有用的指標，可以助你配合其他線索證實誠實與否。

伸手摀嘴是想掩蓋謊言 

就小孩子而言，只要看到他把手放在嘴巴外面，爸媽就知道他八成要準備說謊了。長大成人後，我們欺騙的程度和我們試著阻止它洩露出去的方式已變得更為複雜，不過，我們可能仍需要把手放在臉上，特別是嘴上的慰藉。大吃一驚的時候，我們會本能的伸手摀住嘴巴。這種不自覺的動作是為了防止一種未經思考的情感在嘴巴被迫張開時洩露出來──我們需要時間評估。

所以，在面臨壓力或驚奇時，成年人仍不免把手伸向嘴巴。在涉及謊言的情況，手或許會放到嘴上（即一般所謂的摀嘴），這是掩蓋謊言，或者某件你覺得不該說的事情（來不及了！）的一種方式。大腦排斥這個虛假的信息，於是命令手去把它遮起來。手掌通常會遮住整張嘴，拇指指向耳朵（有時這會讓這個人顯出焦慮的樣子──若非漫天大謊，它通常是某種焦慮或懷疑的徵象）。

可能會與摀嘴交替出現的是用手托住下巴，而只有一指碰觸嘴巴的舉動，有點類似我們小時候比的「噓」，一指貼著嘴唇示意對方安靜。會做出這種動作是因為潛意識把訊息傳到手部，叫我們閉嘴。另一種姿勢是五指張開，遮住嘴唇。有時候，遮住嘴巴的是拳頭而非張開的手掌。這更常出現在對方聽了你的話而覺得你有所隱瞞的時候，他們採取手接觸口的姿勢是因為正在壓抑一股不自覺的，想要質疑你的衝動。  

突然蹺二郎腿表示不安  

但廣泛的研究顯示，身體最容易顯露是否在說謊的部分，是下半身，也就是腰部以下。雖然下半身，包括腿和腳，都會受到我們的意識掌控，但因為它們離大腦最遠，特別是腳，因此當某人試圖欺騙時，它們會是身體最不受控制的部分。在壓力情境中，位於下半身的腳踝或許會彼此交叉，呈現我們熟悉的「鎖踝」姿勢。有趣的是，在這種情況下，不僅腳不會有什麼動作，手和臂膀的動作通常也會受限，呈現封閉式身體語言的叢集。

有時你會見到上述姿勢的變種：用腳跟勾住椅腳（對男性是不自然的姿勢）。如果有椅臂的話，這通常會和緊抓椅臂同時出現，要不然當事人多半會雙臂交叉，或者極為坐立不安。這是人們有所隱瞞時相當常見的坐姿（或是感到焦慮或基於某種理由築起防禦時）。他們的身體與心理狀態既以這種姿勢達成和諧，這種姿勢自然反映了他們的負面情緒。只要他們堅守防禦姿勢，他們的腳就不會動了。

上述例子，腳在不安時是處於不動狀態，不過腳也可能有一些出於不安的動作，透露類似的訊息。例如許多人會蹺二郎腿，而懸空的那隻腳會不斷上下、左右晃動或繞圈圈。有些人不會表現出這個動作。請觀察對方的腳會不會從靜止不動突然動起來；或是從繞圈圈變成上下踢動，這通常（不自覺的）洩露了惱怒或極度緊張的情緒。這可能會和偶爾蹺腳或偶爾把腿放下的動作一起出現。這些動作看來並不自然，反倒顯得矯揉造作。  

說話變慢或許在竄改事實 

非言語行為的第二部分，也是說話的非言語部分，能給予我們非常重要的線索，一旦配合其他身體方面的線索，便可透露許多信息。話會說得比平常慢是因為說話的人正在仰賴記憶，而非事實。另外，他的大腦也有許多認知活動在進行，因為它正被要求以謊言竄改事實，也要避免經由身體洩露。當然，如果經過充分演練，說話的速率或許就不會顯現可察覺的差異。

我們解釋什麼的時候，或許會在某些時刻出現可被人辨識的停頓或沉默。欺騙時通常會在字與字和句與句間製造比平常多的停頓。甚至會出現話說到一半、思緒未完成的情況，然後陷入一陣長長的沉默，而這個人不會回到原來那個點，而會起一個新的句子。音調可以是非常出色的衡量標準，暗示著人的情感變化，因為情感通常會使音調上揚，而這相當難以隱藏。所以聲音會變得比基線更高，也說不定會更大聲。

試著注意別人說話時，眼神是否亂瞟，還動不動就閉眼睛？撅嘴、托腮、說話時以手指掩嘴、一邊說話一邊不斷調整坐姿……，這些身體語言可能透露風聲：對方不老實！ 

一篇加拿大滑鐵盧大學的研究報導：「眨眼，的確心不在焉」，研究人員提到，為了減少外界資訊的干預，專心想自己有興趣的事，最好的方法就是閉上眼睛。所以，別人在說話，而你在想其他的事情的時候，閉眼睛的頻率就會增加，就成了眨眼了。有些人在努力解釋某個論點、覺得難為情或聽到令他們不高興的事情時，都會眨眼。眨眼過快本身告訴我們的是：那個人正感到不適。說謊，或只是因某事遭到質疑，都會讓人處於壓力狀態，引發眨眼頻率增加。

 眨眼頻率增加是緊張或說謊的焦慮表現，但眨眼頻率過慢的話，也會給人凌駕他人、目中無人的感覺喔。眼睛眨得比一般人慢，意味著眼睛閉上的時間比一般人來得久。眨眼慢慢的，為的就是將人阻隔於視線外久一點。有很多時候，這是我們的身體為了拒人於千里之外，封阻了不愉快的會面或壓力高漲的情境。英國佘契爾夫人接任首相之初經常就會出現習慣性閉眼的舉動，後來經過形象顧問的建議，她接受訪問時就幾乎戒掉這個習慣了。有些時候，人們中斷其他感官活動只為了專心思考。但重點是這種舉動可能會激怒聽者，並傳送錯誤的訊息──無論你閉眼是出於相反的理由，或純屬癖性而已。關係會破裂，全是認知的問題。

別把聽與聆聽混為一談：聽是生理過程。聆聽是心理過程。採用有助於理解對方觀點的方式來傾聽及回應，同時也表現出你真的在聽，是建立親密和諧的第一步。開門見山，拿出好料，因為聽眾的注意力是一項寶貴的禮物，值得費心爭取。提出解決方法，備齊補充資料.結論要清楚明確，千萬別賣太久的關子。不要花俏，一百個字能說清楚的，千萬別廢話連篇。 

在推銷想法的過程中，欠缺信用是障礙之一，你的信用好不好其實存在於溝通對象的心中，建立信用有3種平台

1. 展現能力：拿出過往的輝煌成績，證明自己在某個領域的實力與威信。

2. 展現專業技術：完成一件值得去做的事之後，人們會肯定你的能力，

   而你也靠著本事得到信用。

3. 展現可靠度：展現你這個人可靠又正派，而且不是道貌岸然的人，

   就能讓原本不認識你的人對你產生一些信任

Read more...